depressing as it is my maths results, good music really perks you up.i pray tml will be btr.



ITS OK CHAN TZE WEI. YOU CAN DO IT. ZZZZZZZZZZZZ

it has been yet aonther unproductive day again. lol.

why? cause i literally laze my assed off on bed and slept a (ahha) whooping 15 hours. ahha. and im still lazin in bed and its 1020 pm. wow. win man. i probably should get inducted into nthe gusiness book of records for being the most lazy human on earth. =/

sigh. i tell you, money is really the root of all evil. ytd i could not go back home due to an arguement on money. but thank god and my mother, lucky stars or whatever, tt i had frnds like rashal who even though was a last minute thing, was willing to put me up at her house untill the storm has passed. lol. so heres a big thankyou to you. lol.and u are not as bad as u think u are ok. -_-.

and thus from this incident, i shall stay positive and tell myself, even though my social circle is effing puny, its filled with people who are great and complement my lousy stinky character perfectly. hehe

and i have to really prepare my stamina soon. cause did i tell you, im doing stand chart yet again? and no im not gunning tfor 42 km. my left k nee would have just gave up on me and i might wind up losing my left leg all together. lol. im just going for the 21km. lol. i hope i can shave off abt 20 mins considereing tt time, i nvr did train at all. lol. no holidays for me then before the race. lol.and someones msn nick said tt he/she is also doing the race with her/his friend. lol. maybe we can meet along gthe race? nah.

AHH i should be thinking about the a levels. -__-. not this kind of things.

oh oh, i managed to download lady gagas disco heaven after searching a gazillion sites for it. lol. hehehee. now if i can locate a site for downloading garbages songs, heheh. tt would be great. ah i know now. i shall use tt heeren voucher for my garbage cd. haha. yes i should. but tt would have to wait sometime when im free. haha. which is never going to happen soon.

and i really really wante jelena to get the beijing title and ascend to number 1. haha. random i know.

oh oh, i went out today in the morning though before sleeping again. i had to pass cheryl aw her present we bought in town for her. haha. spend loads of time walking around tt day but since i got loads of food, i shall let it slide. eh u btr like it ok. zzzz. lol. and i bought san anna colourful cake while walking the wsay back from jjc. lol. i duno la, but i used to remember my oarents buying this cake from san anna. but i used to shorter and longer, tastewise, it sitll gtasted the same. moist and filled with strawberry jam. it doesw evoke memories u know. this is certainly one of those few items i would miss dearly if the shop closed. what a waste.

i shall try to stay positive. when life hands u a lemon, what do you do? pass it on to the next unsuspecting person! tt would be the best way to rid urself of the sour sour fruit. lol

schls opening tml. i wonder how i would cope with ehhem. hmmmm. food for thought i guess. hahaha.

till then, have fun people.

listen to lady gaga people. electronica at its finest moments this year.

phew i managed to survive through my tuition today. Its quite a feat alright. lol. cause like, u know when u do not exercise for a very long time and all of a sudden u are going full steam ahead to exercise, soemtimes ur body just finds it extra hard to be in working mode. well, today was kinda like tt. but i guess overall i made it through.

i have been trying my very best to locate lady gagas disco heaven but to no avail. no new songs in my ipod man. sian sian. oh did i tell u how thrilled i am to say that, DUMBASS AYUMI ONLY SOLD 539000 COPIES THIS WEEK? LOL. cause even if its a large amount, she has yet to outsold namies highest debut of the year in japan at 681000! HAHAHAH

ah. today while iw as doing chemistry, i felt like my paper 2 can go and die more and more. sian leh like tt. lol. no choice la hor. i have to get my butt to the library more often and study more man.

tml there will be this class outing which i think, secretly yo myself, that it may not really be successful. but then again, maybe im wrong. and i wun go for a simple reason. i do not want to risk shortening my life by yet another 3 years by having my blood boil. and i will not elaborate further. gosh seems like im taking this all too seriously. lol.

talking about running and stuff earlier, hehe, i went for another 5 km. im starting to feel fitter, but nowhere as fit as i was. well, gotta start from the basics again. back to basics. lol. well, i forgot to talk about friday though. friday went out with char nao and rah and jh to ton for dinner and something else. lol.

i bought quite a lot of food like a strawberry and cheese pancake which did not taste as good as it sounded.=(. but alas, the pretzels and honey walnuts did not fail me. lol. it was really great to hang out with frnds at times. especially when u are brooding over ur miserable social circle, life, and miserable results. well, its comforting to think ur social circle does exist. well, for me at least. -_-.

i really hope we dun drift but alas, some of us have already drifted so far apart, i feel no need to talk to some of the people i used to think were indispensable from my life. well, as in, not in such a crude way of saying but their level of importance have dropped. or maybe its just me who has changed for the worse. sigh. yet another alarming notice of my shrinking social circle. why why? 我的人缘有那么差吗？sian.=(

anws, i gotta go and shower. i took too long a break to cool down from jogging. maybe after my shower, my social circle may expand miraculously and i woulod have more friends?

maybe i should change my character.and yes. i do crave for acceptance at times.



sigh.

ha ha ha.

i guess its time to reflect now. alas. i mean, for anyone who has been(or maybe no one and i certainly am not going to rule out this possibility) reading myu blog, i think u might be getting rather puzzled with my posts. well, i do not blame u flor it. after all, im trying my very best to be discreet abt the thing that are happening and not blabber out too much as i usually do so that, i just got a way out for myself later if i need one.

prelims, are not what i have expected certainly. well, all i can say, im hoping for the beswt for a levels and i'm going to study real hard for it. for my goals that i have set for myself. And i really hope i can achieve them, unlike the goals i set for o levels but fail to attain and fulfill. i really need to prove myself wrong in some ways. just some important ones. haha.

to a certain extent, i think people do change through their environment. and i think i changed too. from one tt was not afraid of offending people with my acid tongue, i think i have to be more tactful nnow. just to upkeep my puny social circle, that i have to admit, seems to be shrinking at an alaarming rate. ahahaha. not that i really care though. no i actually do care at time ok. lol. im not a dols blooded creatrure like people potray me to be. -__-. ah what the hell am i driving at. driving into a tree i think.

and and, newsflash. i know this is very very shocking, but im tyring my very best, to start talking to my father. and he has been trying to be as accomodating. i think, life is just too short to bear this kind of hatred grudge or whatever u call it. especially against ur family member whose going to be behing you everytime no matter what mean things they say in your face. hjaha. to forgive and forget is indeed something very, how do i put it, very therapeutic in a sense. to myself, and also, it feels better i guess. bury the hatchet and move on with life i guess.

its the same with a certain someone la. i guess...

i do miss the days where i blurted anything out i wnated to say. haha.

anws, after tmls paper, im probably going home to jog after noe jogging for about 2 weeks now. i feel berry berry unhealthy. boooooo. gotta build up the fitness. and somehow, i really awant to pon schl right after all my papers are given back. after all, school has been less of a conduicive environment, more of one that i see poeple i dread meeting. haiz. what about those things about forgiving i said up there now eh? it just needs time to come la. -_-. i probably only forgive people i feel should be forgiven or smth. unlike __________. eh if u think u are right for being buay song about my aloofness and pretending tt i do not exist, go ahead and delude urself further, even though i concede the fact i really am aloof at times. but u ain't gonna bring me down now. haha

its time to work hard. i will and i know u all will too. just dun work as hard as me so tt i have a higher chance of achieveing my goal, muahaha.

till then.

and alas. all problems are solved. i hope

alas i felt i went aboard again. zzzz. i guess im one to just blurt out whatever i feel when the going gets touch eh. -__-. guess i shloud edit my post soon. lol.

alas, it was all calm but i knew, i knew that cracks were forming. and these cracks would soon cause the land to break from each other and not be associated with each other.

i shall not call you a hypocrite cause if i did, im sure thousands of girls who go gaa gaa over you will be hounding me like mad people from an asylum armed with a knife tt could probably cut through me like paper, i bruise easliy. LOL AHAHAHAHA. i BRUISE EASILY. HAHAHAHAH

i just do not like the fact tt some people can scott free of their evil malicious doings while im always the one whos potrayed as the bad guy. zzzz. ain't fair man this world.

i cannot be bothered for whatever ur explanation you would come up with if u wanted to. for one, i dun care. u ain't important in my fucked up life. afterall, i rather eff my notes in the library rather then see ur face. zzzzzzzzz.

i feel im getting outta control again. zzzzzz. not very healthy eh.

and yes. this is only the second time i've felt so darn insulted. ass. so what if i look petty, the fact that my trust i placed in a person has been used to my disadvantage, i dun see the point why i should not feel so pissed! zzzzzzzzz. so goodbye to you cause you are officially out of my small cosy albeit miserable social circle. ahh dun you feel like u have been freed? attaining nirvana and thus being able to practice your wonderfully marvellous hypocripsy that u always do? cool.

gosh. i promise to write better next time. meanwhild im hoping some car crash would happen with tt person involved. hehe. evil evil. sinister like thoughts man.